It was a hot, balmy, Sunday evening and my phone vibrated.
“What did the waiter say to the dinosaur?”
Literally, what is this? Is this his opening line? I’d been laughing with my family all weekend over my sisters cheesy jokes and this seemed like a fitting end.
“What would you like for tea, Rex”
Cheesy as hell, but I actually laughed out loud. I couldn’t help myself.
A handsome face and piercing blue eyes stared back at me. Dark hair and a beard. My type on paper!
Ok, I’m playing this down. This guy was EXACTLY my type. To. The. Letter.
But wait…… he’s 30. Christ, thats a 5 year age gap and I have never been keen on getting involved with younger guys. Not only, in my experience, do they tend to never hold up a conversation, it’s rare there would be any sexual compatibility there either.
The struggle is real. Absolutely my type, and funny.
I have absolutely nothing to lose. If he turns out to be an idiot, I no longer have to interact.
So, I responded.
The conversation is GOOD.
He is smart, and very funny. And he asks a lot of questions. He owns his own business and has staff underneath him. He’s ambitious and seems to want to drive his business forward. Innovative too. For a 30 year old, I’m impressed.
My feelings on younger men are my own. I’m trying not to be too ‘generic’ with stuff – I have had experiences with younger guys and they have all been, in a word, awful. So, anyone younger than me, please do not take offence…. it’s just my own personal opinion.
He send me a picture of his bath he is about to jump into….. very nice bathroom and he has a bath board.. I am a fan. There is space for a wine glass. And his bath mat is clean and fluffy – my exes bathmat was always soggy and too ‘man like’ i.e a fucking mess. This is positive. He is watching Mickey Flanagan – my kind of humour.
The chat turns to his relationship history. He’s been through a lot personally but seems resilient and thats a trait I like in a man. He send me a photo of his leg to show me a scar, I mean they look pretty muscular….. #winning.
He send a couple more photos of his legs.
“And further up that you cant really see. Just yet”
Ok, so he’s cheeky. This is not a bad thing.
We talk about confidence and how certain things can hinder your confidence as an indiviual. For me, its my boobs. They’ve always been the centre of attention and I’ve always hated it.
He asks why and I explain and he says “I’m assuming you’ve got big boobs then” which to me, means that they arent the first thing he has noticed from my photos. Either that or he is very clever and knows how to come across slightly more innocent than he is.
“There’s much more to you than them”
Well yes, Mr CEO, there is! Another point in the bank for you.
“So, tell me more then…”
And what follows is a conversation full of random facts about each other, we have some similar views on things and like some of the same stuff so this is all seemingly going swimmingly.
The conversation flows, until he falls asleep. I wake up to a message first thing and we resume where we left off.
In and out of the day, we dip into WhatsApp as he is playing golf and I am studying.
He asked to be accepted onto my Instagram. For me this is very personal. My 2 accounts are very much an exposure of my life and my personal journey’s and I took a few hours to decide if I wanted to allow that or not. But I figured that if I was going to get to know this guy, I needed him to know who I am as a person and not just the few photos that are up on my dating profile.
He gets accepted and the conversation continues.
It’s later into the evening when the conversation turns to more 18+ topics.
And when it does, I am not put off by it. I had been reading my own blog not minutes before and, dare I say it, my own blog turns me on. I’ve read back through FWB and Mr 911 and I am suitably prepared for what happens with the CEO next.
He asks when I last had sex and I explain that it is over a year ago.
He asks what my weapon of choice is. I ignore that one.
His last time was 8 weeks ago, with a FWB. They were drunk….. they had agreed to stop sleeping together a while ago but this has just ‘happened’ – hmmmmmm. I ponder this over and wonder if it really is finished. But decide that it doesn’t really bother me, I’m not looking for a husband and everyone has a life.
I mean, he is VERY complimentary. Is it just his way of getting what he wants or is he genuine? At this point, I’m not really sure that I care – I’m at a level where I know the inevitable is going to happen as this conversation progresses and I’m ok with it tonight. In fact, I actually feel like I need it.
The conversation moves to a list of do’s and don’ts…….
It’s fair to say we are both very worked up by this point.
“How wet are your knickers?”
“I’m not wearing any”
“You’ll be playing in the next 10 minutes”
“No, I wont be. And you do not get to tell me what to do. Yet”
“Who said anything about me telling you what you’ll be doing…. You’ll be playing off your own accord”
Ok, the conversation is heating up now and I am seriously worked up. I can feel my cheeks blushing and my chest going red….. I feel the familiar pull between my legs and I know exactly what I need from him in this moment.
We talk more and he approves of black lacy underwear – although in his words, he prefers it on the floor. I want to see what I know is inevitabley coming and I steer the conversation that way…..
My phone goes off…… and what I get back is something that can only be described with the BIG EYE EMOJI. I’m not in any way offended. I have entered into this conversation knowing full well where it was going and I am welcoming it. There is consent from both parties.
It. Is. Thick. Oh my goodness – smooth and thick and perfectly pink. There is a slight curve towards him and the first thing I think about is how well that would hit all the right spots if I were fucking him.
I AM GONE. I’m deep into this conversation now. All I can think about is fucking him. I can see his bed and the surrounding room and I am there, in my mind, on top of him, with my boobs in his face, rocking back and forth, my hands grasped into his.
We swap more messages about favourite positions, things that get us where we need to be… and fast.
He asks if I like sex toys.
I dont think he realises who he is talking to here……..
A bullet is agreeable to us both – powerful, yet small enough to not interfere with the fucking.
He is playing with his cock.
BOOM – another photo but at a different angle. Oh my god, the head. It’s so round and pink. I picture my hands around it, moving up and down, up and down, feeling him pulsate in my palm.
I tell him that I would be able to shuffle between his legs and take him in my mouth in a second.
There is another photo. The head is totally exposed now and the pre-cum shines under the flash of his camera.
Fucking hell, he is THICK.
OMG. A VIDEO.
Wow. He pulls his foreskin right back and the shiny head is so exposed, it is literally glistening.
My legs are clamped shut at this point. I am not ready to play just yet.
The lead up to what I know will come later is so enjoyable, I don’t want to steal away that fruit just yet.
I know he is playing and I like it. I feel like I have the power. I know he wants to cum. I tell him if I were there that I would be going faster with my hands.
He asks where I would want him to cum.
He explains in no uncertain terms that if he was fucking me and he filled me up, he would be straight down there, onto my clit, with his mouth.
I ask if he would do that right after he just came.
It continues as this level….and then he reaches tipping point.
I’m pleased as I know our conversation has gotten him there.
He calls me a good girl and away from the messages, I lose my shit. That turns me on so much when I am horny.
He wants to come and fuck me. Obviously that isnt going to happen – it’s late and I have work tomorrow, I’m knackered.
He wants to play again.
I tell him I am going to sleep…. he asks if I am actually going to bed. I say yes, that I am actually going to sleep.
He asks me not to dream about him too much….. but if I do – that I’m riding his dick in my dreams.
I say goodnight, but I am not ready to sleep just yet…….